12 June, 2007

How the U.S. Military Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Gays

I saw this story last night I had a difficult time believing it. I still do. Yet there's plenty of press
on it today. It really does sound like something from The Onion. Or maybe Austin Powers. So, you have the U.S. military trying to "turn" their enemies gay (and/or flatulent). What are we in sixth grade? Maybe we can give the enemy cooties while we're at it! If that was to be the strategy, can all those Arabic linguists get their jobs back, guys? Or is it still not o.k. to be gay in this military, rather only o.k. to be gay if this military is trying to defeat/kill you? Is there a lesbian bomb? And, as J. Robert Oppenheimer told us about nukes, you can't put that genie back in the bottle and the world would be changed forever. Gay bomb secrets would be leaked leading to gay bomb stalemates in the world's hot spots...Next thing you know somebody like North Korea or Iran will have the gay bomb!

I am exceptionally intrigued as to the feedback I'll get on this from those of my friends who are gay and lesbian because this story is causing my brain to come up with all sorts of silly, silly vignettes.


Update: Email response from a friend who is a lesbian:
"so far the lesbian response (all 3 of us) has been delight (and all of us
want to drop that bomb) -- none of that "how dare they say we're not
combat-ready 'cause we're queer" stuff the boys were harping on (who
cares?) I know it's a tired stereotype about both queer men and
women that all we do is have sex, but in this context it's simply
hysterical :) "

1 comment:

Unknown said...

How is turning an army into homosexuals a strategy? Just when you think the Bush Administration's reputation can't get any worse.... what does Paris think? hahaha